


Hope, Love and Belonging

by ClaireLou



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bedside Hand-Holding, Ben is 25, Birthday Presents, Bump Touching, F/M, Fluff, Foster Care, Friendship/Love, Hero Ben, Hormonal Rey, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Underage Sex, Pregnant Rey (Star Wars), Rey Needs A Hug, Rey finds a Home, Rey is 17, Rey is 18 before anything happens, Softboi Ben, Strangers to Friends, Strangers to Lovers, Teen Pregnancy, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings, but not for long, midwife
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-23
Updated: 2019-02-03
Packaged: 2019-10-15 06:38:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 12,913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17523725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ClaireLou/pseuds/ClaireLou
Summary: Rey is 17 when she misses her period. She's terrified and knows her foster father, Unkar Platt, will kill her. She needs to get out, but with no money and nowhere to go, she's trapped.That is until she scrapes enough money to see a midwife, there she meets Amilyn Holdo and Maz Kanata and as a Domino effect ends up in the care of Leia and Han Solo.Ben becomes her biggest supporter, helping her with everything she needs, he's there for her when no one else has been. She tried to blame it on her hormones but she knows deep down that shes falling for Ben.Meanwhile, Ben can't help but see the brave woman she is. Maybe, just maybe hes falling for her too, though he knows he shouldn't.However is Rey really going to escape her old life that easily? What happens when both past and future collide in a game of revenge?





	1. Please Help Me

**Author's Note:**

> This is my second outing into a Reylo Fic, this one is all planned out. I know exactly where its going. I've got it at 25 Chapters and am so excited to be writing this. More Tags will be added as the story progresses.
> 
> The names probably terrible and I know the summary is shockingly bad but I hope the story will make up for it. To reiterate, Rey starts the story off at 17, but nothing will happen even remotely romantic until she is past 18 and even then its pretty PG haha.
> 
> I don't have a Beta, if there is anything glaringly obvious, please don't hesitate to let me know.

When Rey missed her period, she was terrified, she was never regular but this time she knew something was different; the early morning sickness, the aching and the tiredness a dead giveaway to her condition. This would be the end of her, her foster father Unkar Plutt would be livid. He would punish her, and she would be unable to work at the scrap yard scavenging. How was she ever going to feed a herself and a baby when even now she is lucky to find enough scrap to feed herself two or three times a week. She had no money and no way to support this child, she was stuck.

She had limited her food intake even more for several weeks after her missed period to save enough money for a visit to family planning, she was fairly sure she didn’t need confirmation of her pregnancy but with the lack of food she was having she knew she needed to take vitamins to make sure her child was healthy, she maybe had enough for a month’s supply and by the end of that she could maybe afford another months. 

The family planning centre was 10 miles away from her foster father’s house, without enough money for the bus and a visit to the clinic she had to walk. Thankfully it was the middle of May and the weather was quite temperate for a 2 and a half hour walk to the other side of town. 

Once she arrived at the clinic, her nerves kicked in, she was about to confirm her worst fear that she was having a baby. She gave her details to the receptionist whilst holding back a sob and was told to take a seat and wait for the nurse. Rey was too nervous to sit, so ended up reading pamphlets that were lined along the walls. She saw one for ‘Abortion’ and she would be lying if she said the thought hadn’t crossed her mind, but she couldn’t do it, she would never be able to forgive herself. She was cast aside by parents that should have loved her when she was a baby and to her that was bad enough, she couldn’t end a life before it had begun knowing that she would love a child with all her heart.

Rey lifted her head from the pamphlet she was reading on pregnancy vitamins as a tall nurse with purple hair called her name. She smiled, stashing the paper in her pocket and took a step towards the friendly looking woman. 

“Are you alone?” the nurse enquired.

Rey shrugged and murmured a small “yes”

“Well not to worry, I’ll take good care of you. I’m head midwife here, Sister Holdo but you can call me Amilyn” she directed Rey into a small room at the end of the corridor and motioned for her to take a seat.

Rey sat down across from the desk and waited for Amilyn to sit down, she twiddled her thumbs and looked around the room. She hadn’t noticed that amylin was looking at her softly, concerned for the young girl sat across from her.

“So, Rey, what brings you here today? My notes say that you think you may be pregnant?” 

Rey nodded slowly, biting her lip with all she could. She did not want to cry right now but it was an inevitability. A sob escaped her lips and then the tears began to fall.

Amilyn rushed around to her side and put an arm around her shoulder. “There, there my dove, not to worry. Tell me everything and we will get this sorted. Are your parents aware of anything?”

That’s when the words started to pour from reys lips, everything she could possibly say tumbling out between sobs and gasps for air. Words like ‘starving’, ‘foster care’, ‘alone’, and ‘Please help me’. That last one seemed to tip the balance and Amilyn stood straight up and after passing Rey the box of tissues she had been holding she excused herself, so she could make a phone call.

Rey sat solemnly yet somehow relieved, small hiccups occasionally interrupting her breathing. She wasn’t usually one to cry or to share her burdens but Amilyn seemed like the first person she had come across in her life that might just be able to help.

After about 20 minutes Rey really needed to go to the toilet, she stood from her chair and walked towards the door Amilyn had exited. Just as she reached for the handle, the door opened softly to reveal a small lady with very thick glasses. Rey was about to find out that though this lady was small, she was a giant hero.

“Ah young girl, let me look at you. You poor thing. I’m Maz Kanata, I work at Niima Social Services. Amilyn called me and said you might need some help. I pulled your file and came straight away. So, let’s take a look and see what we can do” She gestured for Rey to sit back down.

“Actually, I really need the toilet, I was just about to go and ask where they were”

“Fine, fine my dear. It’s a good a time as any to confirm your pregnant” Maz walked over to the cupboard and pulled open the doors, after a moments deliberation she seemed to find what she was looking for. Turning around she handed a small pot over to Rey. “take this, pee into it and we will test it, just for medical records”

“Erm… ok. Where are the toilets?”

“Back out to reception, turn left, first door…. Wow I come here too often” Maz answered her though the last part of her answer seemed to be more for herself than for Rey to hear.

Rey left the room and followed Maz’s directions, finding the toilet quickly. She looked at the pot in her hand and for the life of her she wasn’t sure how she was supposed to pee in to such a small opening. But needs must, she sat down and positioned the pot beneath her. She did not pee on her hand, she didn’t. After securing the lid and thoroughly washing her hands, twice, she walked back to the room.

As Rey approached the door, she could hear both Maz and Amilyn in a seemingly heated conversation.

“I don’t care Maz, look at her, she cannot go back to her foster father. She’s skin and bones, she said she hadn’t eaten a full meal in over 3 weeks. He’s not feeding her, he’s not protecting her, and I will not let her leave this office to go back to him. I won’t.” Amilyn voice cracked the more she spoke.

“Amilyn listen to me closely, I don’t want her to go back either, but we have to follow the rules. She’s 17 and pregnant, she has some rights, but she is still a ward of the state. I can take her back to my office and go from there but it’s going to be a long process and if she won’t go back, which I will wholeheartedly back her up on that, then she needs to be able to go someplace safe and currently I’m limited to out of state or a group home. Neither of which would be to her benefit.”

Rey couldn’t stand outside of the door longer, this was her future and her babies future she needed to be a part of the decision. She knocked lightly on the door and walked back in. Both women looked at her and smiled. Amilyn noticed the pot in her hand and moved to take it from her.

“let’s get this tested shall we and make sure everything is ok” She walked over to the sink and pulled out a small tin, removing 2 strips from it she dipped them individually into the pot. “A few minutes and we will know for sure Rey, take a seat.” 

Rey sat in the seat she had before, Maz sitting next to her and taking her small hand in her even smaller one.

“It’s ok my dear, we will do what needs to be done regardless of the outcome”

Rey looked to the woman and dared herself to hope, even without a baby would she really be able to get out from under Plutts roof. Rey took a deep breath, she knew better than to rely on hope, but she had immediately trusted both of these women and she prayed silently that they would be able to help her out of the life she had had for the past 10 years.

Amilyn turned back to them both and branded both tests in front of her. “Well little dove, you are indeed pregnant. We will get you scanned to check how far along you are, when did you say you thought you should have had your period?”

Rey was stunned, she k new she was pregnant, but having it confirmed by someone else was a different kind of feeling. She was shocked but so happy. She placed her hand over the lower part of her tummy and smiled, she looked to Amilyn and counted back to when she was supposed to come on her period. 

“April 13th should have been about right, I think”

Amilyn looked to a calendar on her desk and hummed, she reverse counted week by week. Rey watched her fingers move up the calendar, eyes widening slightly of how many weeks she had gone past.

“That works out at about 9-10 weeks, does that sound about right?”

“Yeah, probably. I thought it would be less” Rey shrugged, counting back she thought it would have been 7 weeks maybe 8, but she would believe Amilyn.

Maz spoke next, she arranged for Rey to come with her back to her offices and a second appointment in a few weeks with Amilyn again. She sorted out a prescription of prenatal vitamins and some extra vitamin tablets to make up for the lack of nutrients in her diet. Before they left Amilyn asked Rey if she wanted to have a scan to see her baby. Without hesitation Rey had said yes and was now lay down on an examination table, her top pulled high whilst Amilyn coated her machines handle in gel. Maz sitting patiently beside her patting her head.

“This will be a little cold Rey” she moved the device to reys abdomen and pressed down after a few seconds she smiled and flipped a switch. The room erupted in a steady thump thump sound.

Rey burst into tears, she may not be the smartest of girls, but she knew what that was. That was her baby. Its heartbeat sounded so strong. Amilyn had turned the screen towards Rey and she looked eagerly to the monitor. There in grainy black and white was a little bean, it was so tiny and instantly fell in love.

Amilyn took a few screen shots of the baby and measured them. “Well everything looks ok; all measurements are fine. Baby is a little small but that’s easily rectified, heartbeat is very strong, and my measurements suggest a small 10-week gestation. I’d put your due date about the 18th December, so Christmas baby, how exciting”

Rey sniffled and smiled. Adjusting her top after wiping off the excess gel with the tissue Maz had handed to her. She was handed a copy of the scan picture and held it close to her heart. That little bean was inside of her and she would protect it and love it with all of her soul. It was agreed that they would come back in 2 weeks for a twelve-week scan and appointment. Maz would take up Reys case file and ensure she could get back to the clinic. Rey had said thankyou to Amilyn and had hugged her goodbye. Getting into Maz’s car she hoped this was the start to a brighter future.


	2. Finding a Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is just a short chapter, but we needed a little story information.

Rey had been at Maz Kanata’s office for about 4 hours.

On the way back, they had stopped off at the closest take out and got Rey a burger and fries. She had wolfed that down so fast that Maz had given her the rest of her fries. Once they had arrived Rey was taken to one of the interim bedrooms for foster children, Maz had told her that she was more than welcome to take a shower and she would find her some of the spare toiletries and clothing they usually keep stocked in the store room. 

So, 1 hour after arrival she had been clean and warm and sat in Maz’s office speaking to a police officer. Officer Dameron had explained upon seeing Reys obviously distressed face that she wasn’t in any trouble, but he needed her to give as much detail as possible as to her home life, so they could put a case together that would allow her to stay out of her foster father’s care. 

She had spent around 2 hours explaining every meal she had missed, every night she wasn’t allowed to sleep in a bed, every time she was forced to do something a child shouldn’t have to. Officer Dameron, ‘Poe’ as he had asked to be called stated that with what she had told him she would never have to go back to that house again and that Maz would have the full scope of the law to allow Rey to go elsewhere.

So here she sat another hour after Poe had left whilst Maz was working through everything she needed too to enable Rey to find a new emergency home. So far, the approved foster carers she trusted to take on Reys case were unavailable. Rey had taken to watching tv in the corner of Maz’s office, when she heard Maz slam the phone down for the hundredth time and huff a sigh of frustration.

“Is everything ok Maz?” Rey asked hopefully.

“Its’s fine dear, I’m just trying to find one of my trusted foster carers for you, I don’t want you to go to one of the group homes but everyone I know already has a child or 2 and can’t have any more” Rey noticed Maz was looking increasingly exhausted as the day had gone on. She knew she was trying to help her the best she could. Maz had spent all afternoon, holding her hand, passing her tissues and asking if she was ok. It was more than anyone had done for her in 10 years. 

Rey stood up and walked over to Maz’s desk, leaning gingerly on the edge. “Maz, its ok, I’ll go wherever you can get me, don’t worry about me I’ve been through worse” it cost her to say it, but Rey hated watching the old lady suffer at her expense.

“Oh dear, no, you will be put somewhere safe… it’s just going to take me a little while. Would you be ok staying here tonight? In the interim bedroom? I’ll stay here too whilst I find a good safe house for you”

“Maz I’ll stay wherever you need me too, you’ve given me hope” Rey looked down at herself, Maz had given her so much. She had clean clothing and a full tummy, it had been a long time since she could say that. Most of all hope, that she might make it out of this life. 

“Hope…… hmmm, maybe we have another option.” Maz started to flip urgently through the files on her desk and then abruptly stood and went to her filing cabinet. Rey could hear muttering to herself about hope, believing, night. She had no idea what any of it meant but Maz seemed to be excitedly searching for something.

“I’m going to get a drink Maz, do you want one?”

“No dear, Thank you. Head off to bed, by morning I might just have the perfect place for you”

Rey left her too it and went to the communal kitchen she had been shown earlier, brewing herself a cup of tea, she sat at the dining table. By now Plutt would know something was wrong, she wouldn’t have been seen for almost 10 hours and even by his neglectful standards that would have been too long. She wondered what he might do when he was told that she wouldn’t be coming back. She had been assured by both Officer Poe and Maz that he would not be made aware of her pregnancy but that she had been removed from his care. Rey knew he wouldn’t be bothered about losing her, just the hefty sum of money that came alongside her, money she had never seen a single bit of. That wasn’t her problem though, for now she was safe with Maz and if she was right by tomorrow Rey would have somewhere even safer.


	3. Blueberries and Breakfast

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we meet Ben and emotions run high.

Rey woke up feeling more refreshed than she had in longer than she could remember. For once in her life her stomach didn’t feel completely empty. She looked to the clock on the bedroom wall, it was past 10am, she never slept this late. 

Heading to the bathroom for her regular morning sickness episode, she grabbed yesterday’s clothes, cleaned herself up and dressed as fast as she could, eager to get to Maz and fill up on another breakfast. She made the bed before she left the room, if Maz had been able to find her a new home then she wouldn’t be coming back here but she wasn’t going to leave a mess. As she walked down the hall, she heard water running in the kitchen assuming it must be Maz she walked faster to the kitchen, however when she got there, she found it occupied, but not by Maz.

She studied the tall man, he was facing the wall where the sink was, by the movement of his shoulders she guessed he was washing up. She leaned against the door jam and watched him, she was unsure about just walking into the kitchen when she didn’t know him. He was very large, broad shoulders and a massive frame. His hair jet black and shaggy. He looked like he was in a world of his own staring out of the window whilst cleaning a cup from what she could tell. After a few moments he turned around and stopped still, he looked her up and down and then smiled.

“Didn’t hear you come in, must have been a long way off”

“Sorry, I just came to get breakfast, I thought you were Maz. But… well… you’re about a million feet taller than her” smirked Rey.

The man chuckled lowly, “Don’t let Maz hear you say that, she’s small in stature, she’s a giant in attitude. I’m Ben” 

Rey moved towards the fridge and opened the door peering in to see what she could find for breakfast, she pulled out the milk and some blueberries. She had eaten one last night and decided she absolutely loved the taste of them. After closing the door, she turned to ben and smiled shyly.

“Rey” she nodded.

“Ah Rey, it’s good to put a face to a name. We have heard a lot about you this morning”

Rey swallowed forcefully “We?” she questioned.

“Yeah, my mom and dad. I think we might be in line to looking after you. My dad’s working but mom is in the office with Maz” He moved towards her and took the milk from her hand and placed it down on the table. “Sit down, let me get you some cereal, Maz usually keeps the good stuff at the back of the cupboards. If she can’t reach it, she knows the kids can’t either”

Rey chuckled lightly and moved to get 2 bowls off the draining board “I’ll take whatever’s easiest, honestly, foods food to me”

“Oh no we can do better than that” he turned back to the cupboard and reached to the back with a small ah-ha he pulled a box of ‘Sugar Flakes’ out. Turning to Rey triumphantly he smiled “told you the good stuffs back here”

Walking towards the table he sat across from Rey and pulled the bowls towards him, he filled them both high and then poured the milk over. He pushed a bowl back to Rey, she smiled and dove straight into the piles of sugary goodness.

“Mmmm thank you” She mumbled around a mouth full of cereal.

“No problem, we have to feed you up abit” 

Reys face fell at the last bit, she didn’t want to feel like a charity case, she knew full well she was one, but she didn’t want to be reminded that no one had ever cared enough. Tears gathered in the corners of her eyes, ben must have noticed because he reached out and placed his hand over hers on the table.

“God Rey, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean anything by it”

“No, its fine, I know you didn’t mean anything. It’s just my life’s been really bad, and no one knew about it and here you are, a complete stranger being kind to me and promising me that I will get food. Food has never been given so easily before” as she finished the tears fell from her eyes.

“Truly, I’m so sorry Rey. I promise, if you come home with us life will not be that hard. I promise there will be food whenever you want it and we will protect you” 

Rey looked up into his eyes, he seemed so earnest and he was promising everything she could have ever wished for. She stood up and placed her bowl in the sink, gripping the edge of the sideboard she took a deep breath. Trying to control her emptions she didn’t hear ben move until he placed his hand on her shoulder. She didn’t flinch, which if she hadn’t been so emotional would have come across as odd, she usually hated when men touched her. Instead she turned around into his arms and sobbed. She could feel him hesitantly rubbing her back and she cried. 

After several minutes passed, reys sobs quieted and she pulled back from ben “I’m so sorry, you’re just the first person in 10 years….” 

Ben interrupted her, he lowered his head to her level “Rey you never need to apologise, please don’t explain yourself. Everything will be better now.”

Rey gulped as she noticed how dark his eyes were, she could see herself in them and for a moment she lost herself. A little breathlessly she muttered “Thank you”.

“Come on, let’s go find my mom, she can’t wait to meet you. I imagine her and Maz have finished up the paperwork needed”

Rey nodded for him to lead the way, as they walked down the corridor to Maz’s office she pondered about bens age. He was older than her, but from what she could tell not by much, maybe 5 or 6 years. 

Once they reached the office, ben knocked softly and then opened the door, standing aside to let Rey past. She walked into the room to find Maz with another woman. The lady turned to look at Rey and beamed a soft smile at her.

“ben, we wondered where you had got too. I see you’ve met Rey, are you alright dear?” Maz spoke to ben with a smile and must have noticed reys puffy eyes. She eyed ben pointedly when she addressed Rey.

“Yeah, I’m fine, hormones, I think. I met ben in the kitchen, he made me breakfast”

“Oh, I did raise him right” the other woman in the room smiled innocently at ben, Rey could tell this was for show there was definitely an inside joke there somewhere.

Rey looked to her then and noticed the similarities between her and ben. The eyes were the same colour and though she may not have the height, there was no denying this was bens mom.

“Hi Sweetheart, I’m Leia. Maz has filled us in on everything and if its ok with you we would really like you to come home with us. Would that be ok?” 

Rey looked between everyone in the room, Leia seemed hopeful that she would say yes, Maz smiled knowingly like she knew she would say yes, and ben looked worried. She didn’t even have to think about it, she knew without an ounce of doubt that she would go home with these people. She knew that there would be no looking back after this.

“Yes Leia, I really would love to come home with you”


	4. Pregnancy Sucks

Rey had gone home with Leia and Ben. She had met Han and they had instantly bonded over the car he had been working on. As they had pulled up, Han had been under the bonnet of a ‘Falcon 220’, a car Rey knew the ins and outs of from the scrapyard. He had mentioned how he wanted to keep her forever, she had held back the tears.

After that they had settled into a fairly normal existence, antenatal appointments were abundant, and Leia attended every single one with her holding her hand in the waiting room and helping her to understand anything she didn’t. It was nice, almost like having a mother. What surprised her most was having Ben around, he had been so kind to her, helping her to study the baby related reading she had been given by Amilyn. He made sure she always had food, creating a secret stash in his room of pure junk food that she was allowed whenever she wanted. Leia was great but determined to feed her healthy portions of vegetables and meat and there’s only so many casseroles a 17-year-old could take. So regularly she found herself rummaging through bens stash for a ‘snowball’. 

Han had kept her mind busy, letting her help with the light duties of fixing up the car, she regularly came into the house covered in oil. She loved every second of it. He told her Leia would ring his neck if he let her so much as pick up a wrench, but she was happy just to be allowed to help.

It went on like this for weeks, a picture of normal, a happy family. She was getting large, she had made it out of the first trimester and was heading towards 20 weeks. In fact, her appointment was in 3 days and she was nervous, she had felt a little off for a few days. Little pains in her rapidly growing bump, nothing too sharp but little twinges that stopped her for a few moments. 

One such pain hit her out of nowhere as she was getting out of the shower early on Tuesday morning. It had stopped her still and she winced slightly, it radiated through her bump and down into her hips. This lasted longer than the others and it ached so much more than the others. She placed one hand on her bump and one on the door frame, trying to breathe through it.

“Argh... come on…stop” she tried to stand straighter, to will the pain away but it wouldn’t go. She took another deep breath. Counting and breathing slowly, each second becoming slightly more panicked.

Eventually someone came into the hallway, they must have spotted her hunched over and came straight to her. Placing their hand over hers on her bump, using their other to move her chin up to face them. It was ben and she was immediately grateful he was here.

“Rey are you ok? Is it the baby?” he was nervous, his eyes shifting from hers down to her bump rapidly.

“I don’t know, it really hurts, it doesn’t normally hurt this much” she gritted out

“Has this happened before?”

“Yes, but not so bad, it just… this time it won’t stop” She sucked in a sharp breath and huffed. She managed to stand straighter, though it took some effort. Regardless of her shower she’s pretty sure a light sweat was on her brow.

“Show me where Rey”

Rey grabbed the hand ben had on her bump and moved it to the left side and down. “Here and then down my hip”

He pulled his hand back and pulled out his phone. She looked at him and he motioned for her to wait a second. He started scrolling through his phone, reading quickly. He looked back to her and then down at her bump.

“Does it ache?” She nodded, “Does it feel like a stabbing pain in your hips?” She nodded again. He proceeded to read and hummed.

“What? What is it ben? Is the baby ok?” she was firing questions out quickly, all manner of things running through her mind that might be wrong. “Please tell me the baby is ok ben please”

“Rey, its ok breathe. I think its stretching pains, look” He handed his phone over to her and pointed to the symptoms section on the page in front of her. She read through it quickly and the more she read the calmer she felt. All her symptoms were the same and it said it was normal.

“Ok, can we still ring Amilyn please? This says it shouldn’t last long but this one really hurt” 

She handed the phone back over to ben and he closed down the internet then found his way to his contacts. Putting his phone to his ear, Rey could hear the ring tone on the other side, someone answered, and ben leant back against the wall, placing his hand softly on her bump. She sighed softly and leant into his side. It was strange having someone taking care of her and it was stranger that she was letting him, but it felt right. It felt normal for him to help her, she could hear him running through her details with what must have been the receptionist at the clinic and explaining what the problem was. He insisted eventually that the receptionist get Amilyn to ring him back when she was free.

He hung up and placed his phone back into his pocket, he hadn’t removed his hand yet from her round belly. He looked down then back at her.

“Karen” he air-quoted “said she will get Amilyn to call back when she comes out of her next appointment.”

She placed her hand over bens “Thank you ben, the pains gone now but I’d really like to just hear a medical professional say its ok”

“That’s fine Rey, if you need me to take you to the clinic I will.”

She let her head fall back against the wall, her panic subsiding, she now realised the situation she had found herself in. She was in a small fluffy towel, with ben, the man shed come to terms with her crush on holding her bump so tenderly. Her cheeks instantly flamed, she jumped up as though she had been burned, shocking ben and moving towards her bedroom.

“I’m just going to get dressed” She kept her head down, walked through her door and closed it quickly behind her.

What she would have noticed had she looked at ben as she walked past was the hurt on his face when she had jumped away from him and the guilt in his eyes for the feelings, he had but knew he shouldn’t.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been pregnant 3 times and let me tell you, its really crap haha I love my children, I'd have a million if I just didn't have to be pregnant first.


	5. Awkward Silences

Before Rey knew it Friday had come around and it was the day of her 20-week scan. Amilyn had called back the other night and confirmed Ben’s theory that it sounded like stretching pains, but she assured her that when she came Friday for her appointment that she would thoroughly check her over.

She had attempted to avoid Ben as much as possible after Tuesday evening, she was embarrassed about her reaction to him. She knew it was getting worse. She tried to pretend that it was just hormones, but the more she thought about it and the more she spent time with ben she knew she couldn’t blame the crush entirely on that. There were some genuine feelings there, as wrong as she knew it was, she couldn’t shake that she really liked him. He’d probably be mortified to know the pregnant foster child fancied him, he was just trying to be kind and she developed feelings for him like a lost puppy. She felt terrible, but she felt like she couldn’t stop herself from revelling in his attention.

Her plans to avoid him came to nothing when Leia informed her that she wouldn’t be able to take her to her appointment at midday today as she needed to go to a meeting. She had said she was sorry but that she would find someone to take her, that someone turned out to be ben, of course it did.

He had come back from work, dressed in a suit, rey had smiled at him briefly as he walked through the kitchen and headed up the stairs. She was just finishing up a snack, blueberries in yoghurt, as shockingly healthy as it was rey really enjoyed it. She took her bowl to the sink and was running the hot water when she heard ben come back downstairs. She placed her bowl on the drainer and turned around, she squeaked slightly when she realised how close he was.

“You ready to go?” 

“Yeah, yeah, I’m just going to get my shoes” She edged around him and darted through to the hallway. Putting her shoes on quickly. She headed to the door, reaching for the handle at the same time as ben he drew his hand back quickly and gestured for her to continue through the door. She looked at him and frowned, he hadn’t yet smiled at her and she was lost at how quick he pulled his hand back from hers.

Once in the car, the tension didn’t let up. She had tried to make conversation, small talk but he answered in short blunt yes or no answers. She didn’t know what she had done but was beginning to dread her appointment, she was so distracted by his mood. She began to run reasons for his distance through her mind, maybe he was annoyed that he had to leave work just to take her to the clinic.

“I’m sorry you had to bring me” she mumbled

“Its fine” his voice was strained

“Ben, what’s wrong? You seem off” She hazarded a look towards him and she could see his knuckles white on his steering wheel. He was really annoyed, and she couldn’t place why.

“Its fine rey, leave it”

“But I don’t understand, you seem really angry, did I…?” She didn’t want to finish the sentence, she didn’t want him to tell her it was her fault as to why he was angry, it would break her heart.

“I’m not angry Rey, its fine. Let’s get you to your appointment” He still hadn’t looked at her and she could see his breathing alter.  
She was beginning to get upset, trying to reign her feelings back in she took a chance.

“Please come in with me” his head whipped round so quickly, that rey jumped a little, startled at his response.

“Why?” his brows drew together, and he turned back to the windscreen. Eyes back on the road.

“Because I want you too, please Ben. I want you there with me” She pleaded with him. She had originally said it to drag him out of his mood but after she said it Rey realised that it would make her happy to have him there with her. 

He gulped and nodded. She sighed in relief, the tension in the car seemed to have dissipated and though the rest of the drive remained in silence it was a lot more comfortable.

Once they arrived at the clinic, bens mood seemed to have shifted, he came around to her side of the car and helped her out. Placing his hand on her lower back, he walked closely by her side through the front door. He checked her in and they both sat in the waiting room. 

After a minute she noticed that a woman sat across the way was looking at ben with disdain, she couldn’t figure out why. She looked back to Ben and then the woman, and outwardly he wasn’t doing anything offensive, though she realised he must have also noticed the scrutiny of the woman as he was sat hunched over and shifted uncomfortably. She looked back to the woman and caught her eye, she glared pointedly and then took bens hand in her own. Sticking her tongue out for good measure, she then turned back to ben and smiled. He was looking at her in wonder and it made her blush, but he relaxed into her side.

Just as he was about to say something Reys name had been shouted by Amilyn. 

They both stood and followed her through to the examination room. Rey knew the drill by now, taking her shoes off, she jumped up on to the table albeit a little slower than she used to. Lying down, she pulled her top up and wedged it underneath her bra, then lowered her leggings. She noticed that ben had turned his head, she imagined it was in some sort of attempt at chivalry. She reached her arm down and patted his knee.

“It’s ok ben, you can look, it’s just a bump”

He turned back to her and laughed self depreciatingly. She laughed quietly next to him, then turned back to Amilyn. The midwife seemed to have been looking at them before turning back to her screen.

“Right dove, are you ready to see your baby again?”

Rey nodded eagerly “Yeah, I’m so excited, do you think you will be able to see what it is?”

“I’ll give it a good go, sometimes the little monsters like to hide away but hopefully baby will play fair” Amilyn laughed. “Do you have a preference?”

“Not even a little bit” She replied giddily. She looked to ben and saw his eyes focused on the screen, he looked in awe of the image. She held back tears, this is what it should have been like. Her and the father of her baby excitedly looking at their baby. That wasn’t what this situation was, but she could pretend, even for a little bit.

“It’s amazing isn’t it? That’s my baby.”

“rey its incredible, it actually looks like a baby. I didn’t know it would look like that” He choked out. Ben looked down to her belly watching as Amilyn rolled the device up and down, pressing slightly. 

“Ok guys, baby is measuring better Rey, that’s a good size for 20 weeks. Whatever you are feeding her ben keep doing it” Rey and ben shared a secret smile. Those snowballs were padding out her baby perfectly. “Are you sure you want to know baby’s sex?”

“yes. please Amilyn” Rey eagerly looked at the screen. She felt bens hand shift into hers and squeeze it tight. 

“From what I can see, I’m fairly certain you are having a baby Boy” Amilyn smiled indulgently down at rey.

Rey choked down a sob, whilst happy tears escaped from her eyes. She looked to ben who seemed to be also struggling to check his emotions. She decided to pretend a little longer and tightened her fingers harder in his hand. He looked down to her smiling softly.

“That’s my baby ben. I’m having a boy. Oh my god, he’s going to pee on me isn’t he” She laughed wholeheartedly, noticing that both Amilyn and ben seemed to join in. 

Amilyn handed her a towel and she wiped down the gel from her bump and righted her clothing once more. Climbing slowly off the bed, she slid her feet back into her shoes.

Amilyn walked around the table and stood in front of her. “Are you still having pains?”

Rey looked up to her and nodded “Yeah, but not as bad since” she pulled her top to the side and followed a path down her side showing Amilyn where it was.

“Well everything inside looked fine, from what you described on the phone its most likely tendons stretching to accommodate that little boy, worst case scenario its Pelvic Girdle Pain, but that’s both unlikely at your gestation and age. I’ll give you a leaflet on both and if it gets worse or changes let me know”

Rey thanked her putting her top back into place. She turned to ben. “You ready?”

“Just a second Rey” Amilyn placed a small black and white image in her hand “That’s your photo, I’m sure Leia will be eager to see that little cutie. And speaking off, ben, can you let your mum know that I’ve sent receipts over to her for Maz. I’ll probably see her sometime in the next 10 years” She laughed softly “it’s been too long, life’s so hectic”

Ben stood rubbing his hand along the back of his neck. “yeah I will do Amilyn, thanks for today” He turned to rey. Placing his hand once again on her back he led her out of the room. Both saying goodbye to Amilyn and heading back to the car.

Rey could not describe the feelings she had currently, she had seen her baby, her son again and she couldn’t believe how perfect he felt. Ben may not be part of her life, but he felt like the family she had sorely been lacking during her life. As he opened the door to let her in, she turned to face him, she didn’t know what made her do it, but she flung herself into his arms, squeezing his middle softly. Her joy was palpable, and she felt him squeeze her ever so carefully back. She wasn’t sure if it was him or her that sighed contentedly.


	6. 18 Years and 30 weeks

Rey had been looking eagerly at her calendar for weeks, counting down the days slowly. She was 30 weeks today which was one reason for her excitement but she was also 18. Finally, legally an adult and she couldn’t have been happier. Now she had a valid and unequivocal voice when it came to her and her sons life, though she would be kept in the system until she was 21 she would have legal rights.

She had been looking forward to this day not only for herself but for her son too. As a pregnant woman in the system she was given a healthy start grant. She was going to be able to actually buy things for her baby. Don’t get her wrong, Leia had offered, more than once, told her that her and her baby would never want for anything but Rey kept putting her off with tales of bad luck omens and superstitions. Though she was pretty sure Leia could see right through those excuses she had never pushed rey, but now today when the grant was approved into the account Leia and Han had opened for her she would be able to go shopping. 

She hurriedly got dressed, stumbling abit when she put her leg into her leggings, forgetting her centre of gravity shifted pretty much daily at this point. She caught herself quickly and finished dressing. She started to walk down the stairs and could smell bacon, its not something she had eaten much growing up but once she moved in here Han had made sure it became a staple part of her diet and she loved it. The crispier the better and if possible doused in treacle, though Han had concluded that was a pregnancy craving because no ‘normal’ person would commit bacon sacrilege like that unless they were temporarily insane, she had laughed until she snorted.

Upon reaching the bottom of the stairs she stopped in her tracks, all around the downstairs were balloons on the walls and confetti on the floor. Tears instantly hit her eyes, she knew without being told that the Solos had done this for her, possibly the first time her birthday had been made a fuss of. She continued on her path to the kitchen wiping her eyes as she went, when she made it to the kitchen door, all 3 solos were there smiling indulgently at her.

In unison they all shouted “Happy Birthday” in a sing-song way.

At that there were no longer tears threatening to fall but gigantic sobs of sheer joy, she ran towards Leia and hugged her so tight, she momentarily worried about crushing her bump. She could feel Leia patting her back, stroking her hair, making small ‘shushing’ sounds.

Eventually her tears cleared, she stepped away, looking up at everyone. Han had moved to the stove, probably a little more than uncomfortable at the tears and emotion. Anytime she had cried over the past few months he handed her a tissue, slapped her back and then said he needed to go do ‘something’. Rey understood. Leia had been subtly wiping her own tears from her eyes with a smile on her face.

“Happy birthday sweetheart, how are you feeling?” 

“I’m good, could smell that bacon from upstairs, it made me hungry” Rey laughed looking to Han.

“Oh don’t you worry, its coming right up, extra large portion for the birthday girl. I even put the treacle on the table, as disgusting as that is” Han smirked at her. She just stuck her tongue out, both of them chuckling seconds later.

“come on rey, lets sit down, let the men provide the bacon and then we can go open your presents” Leia ushered her to the table.

“You didn’t have to get me presents, everything you’ve done, id have been happy with the balloons” Han coughed from the stove “and the bacon” Rey giggled.

She then looked back to the counter and found ben staring at her, as he caught her eyes he smiled, she smiled warmly back. She mouthed “thank you” and he shrugged.

She then noticed the plate in front of him, stacked high with pancakes, he stomach grumbled and she’s pretty sure she felt her son leap for joy inside her. Pancakes and bacon were the best thing ever invented to a 30-week pregnant woman.

They all sat down to their breakfast, Han making the occasional joke at her now adult status, Leia tutting and slapping his shoulder telling him to be quiet. Ben however remained mostly silent other than the sideward glances as she piled her stack higher and higher and spooning treacle over the plateful.

Once they had finished, they had done has Leia had said and moved to the sitting room. Rey sat on the sofa, a pile of presents stacked to her side. She had opened them all with a vigour of a 5 year old at Christmas and thanked Leia and Han for every single thing they had got her. Including a beautiful gold necklace and a phone, it wasn’t the latest model but she could not have cared less, it was her first mobile phone and she loved it. Han told he that all their numbers had already been programmed in by Ben and that he had included any numbers she may need in the future. 

She had asked ben if he could help her put the necklace on, she slid her hair to the side and motioned for him to help. His hand had lingered for a second too long at the back of her neck causing Goosebumps to pop up all down her spine and arms. She turned to him and he looked away, a pink blush rising up his neck to his cheeks. Looking back to his parents she was thankful it seemed neither had noticed.

“Guys, I cant thank you enough for all of this, this has been the best birthday I think I have ever had in my life. I have something to ask though, Leia, I’ve never had a woman in my life and I’ve never known anything close to a mother but I would really love if you could come shopping with me for baby stuff. Help me pick out things for my son, I don’t know what I’m doing but I you are the closest thing to a Grandma this baby will have”

“Oh sweetheart, of course I’ll come with you. Rey, you are the most resilient young woman I’ve ever met, I would be proud to be your sons grandmother and anything else you want me to be” Leia was obviously overcome with emotion and stood up quickly, motioning to go towards the stairs “I’ll just go and get myself sorted and we can go”

“Did I upset her?” She looked to Han and Ben. Han raised his eyes brows and shrugged. Turning to the stairs, he looked back at her.

“Darling that woman would kill for you, I think you wanting her to mean something to your child is probably the highlight of her entire year” Han beamed before heading up the stairs after his wife.

Rey glanced over to Ben, who was looking through his phone, she watched him for a few moments. Thinking about all the ways in which he had helped her over the past few months. His parents had been there physically, reminding her she had a house and a family and people who cared for her but ben he had been something more to her. She couldn’t name it, probably couldn’t even explain it if she tried but he was her emotional support, her mental stability, her person on which she relied for back up. 

Whenever she had a craving at 3am, he was the first to volunteer, when she couldn’t sleep for more than 30 minutes in a row because of her baby moving positions he had come to her rescue offering up his pillows and placing them strategically around her body whilst she nodded off. When she had a melt down because her back hurt, her legs itched and she couldn’t stomach the smell of her own shampoo he had sat by her letting her vent it all out, massaging her shoulders softly. She doesn’t know what she would have done without him and yet he had asked nothing in return even though she would have willingly given him anything she wanted. She knew hormones had nothing to do with this anymore. She was sure she was falling in love with Ben Solo, she was also sure she was screwed.


	7. Deep Breathing, Keep breathing

Rey had been feeling increasingly uncomfortable for the past few hours, every 30 minutes or so a sharp pain would wrap around her bump. She wasn’t stupid, she knew what this was, it was labour. Slow agonising labour. After the first 6 hours of the continual on and off of pain she had whimpered abit when the next one hit. Han had looked up from his chair in question, she had shook her head and lied about her son giving her a big kick in the ribs. She then scampered upstairs to spend the rest of the day out of sight where no one could see her suffer until it mattered.

She knew she should probably share the situation with everyone but she knew she handled pain differently, she liked to hide away, suffer in silence for as long as possible. She would ask for help but when she was ready. After all it was labour, millions of women did this and she was sure she could handle a little discomfort.

That feeling lasted until about 5am on the 13th of December, when her contractions had been getting increasingly closer together and starting to make her sweat. Then without even a slight inkling to what was about to happen her waters broke. She knew now was probably the time to get help. She had been kneeling on her bed when her waters broke, so she shuffled steadily off the bed, grabbing her clean clothes on the way. She headed to the bathroom to quickly clean herself up and get dressed, knowing time was going to quickly run out.

After stopping and starting a few times due to the contractions, she made it back to her bedroom, removed the bedding from her bed and tossed it into the corner, she then picked up the hospital bag she had treated herself to on her 18th birthday when she went shopping with Leia and made her way to their bedroom. They usually woke up at around 6ish, so she was hoping they wouldn’t mind the 5:15 wakeup call too much.

She knocked hesitantly but loudly, after a few moments she heard someone get up from the bed and footsteps get closer to the door. It opened slowly to reveal Leia in her pyjamas, rubbing sleep from her eyes.

“Hmmm Rey sweetheart, what’s up?”

“Erm, I’m really sorry but I think it might be time to go to the hospital” she spoke sheepishly

“Oh… Oh ok, let me wake up Han and we will get you there” Leia was instantly awake and seemed like she was ready to mastermind the entire labour. Rey was secretly glad because as the pains grew stronger she wasn’t convinced she was going to get through this with her pride intact.

As Leia closed her door rey heard another door open, she turned back down the hall to find ben in his doorway, dressed in jogging bottoms and a t-shirt. He looked expectantly to her and stood away from the door frame.

He looked down to her bump then back up “Its time?”

“Yeah… erm how did you know?” her brow creased, surely he couldn’t have heard her conversation with Leia from down the hall.

“Rey you’ve been whimpering in your room all night, I’ve been timing the whimpers. Had you waited any longer I was going to pick you up and take you to the hospital myself.”

She was instantly embarrassed, she thought she had managed to keep quiet but obviously not. She looked down to the ground, gulping. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to wait so long, I thought I could manage it but then my waters broke”

Ben stepped towards her, lifting her chin to face him. “Rey, I’m not telling you off, I was just worried. Its been killing me not to come and comfort you, knowing you were handling it in your own way.”

She looked into his eyes, she was about to say that she wouldn’t have minded him coming in to help her when Leia bustled through her door with Han in tow.

“Lets get this show on the road” Han looked at ben “You coming too son?”

Ben looked at rey and she nodded slightly.

“I guess so”

So as one unit, they strode purposefully to the car. Ben had taken reys bag and was sat beside her in the back seat. Every time she stiffened in her seat in the middle of a contraction, ben leaned over and rubbed her back softly. She keened each time, it didn’t help the pain but it made her feel a little better.

When they arrived at Chandrilla District Hospital, they were directed straight to the maternity ward. Leia had beeped Amilyn Holdo on the way and once they had been guided to a private room, they had been told Amilyn would be there as soon as possible.

Rey had got herself up on the bed as directed, curling up each time a new wave of pain hit her. Her contractions were coming hard and fast by now and she cried out each time a new one came. A midwife had come in and examined her. Telling them that she had been over 8cm dilated and was probably going to be in for quite a quick labour, she laughed as she exited saying that ‘she made no promises’.

Rey nearly punched her. She was pretty sure ben wasn’t far behind on that feeling. He hadn’t let go of her hand since she had got on the bed, she wasn’t sure if it was entirely by choice as she had been gripping him pretty tightly but he hadn’t once complained.

Leia was watching over her like a proud mother and rey felt at ease every time she opened her mouth and barked an order to a nurse. She would be forever grateful for her foster mum taking over this for her, making decisions and getting her through it. Filling out paperwork and translating answers when rey was too short of breath to try.

Han had long since left the room, rey was upset for a moment until Leia had stroked her hair and told her he hadn’t stayed in the room when she was in labour with Ben either. Something about not being able to stand watching people he loved in pain, that had warmed reys heart. Ben had laughed sharply and joked that it was a good thing he got his constitution from his mother.

Amilyn had been in and out a few times, keeping track of the last few centimetres and when Rey had nearly hit full labour she had asked her in all seriousness, if she wanted both ben and Leia to stay. Rey had looked at both people beside her and without hesitation said “yes”.

She had then looked to Ben and asked him if he was ok with that. 

“I wouldn’t be anywhere else” he had told her without a hint of sarcasm. 

So after she had hit 10cms and Amilyn had told her she was going to have to follow her instructions from here on out Rey had knuckled down and waited for the next contraction to hit her.

Leia had kept a cloth at her head and soothing words in her ears, encouraging her every time she had whimpered that she couldn’t do this. 

Ben had kept a hold of her hand, giving her full permission to squeeze it as hard as she could when she needed to. He had been in charge of keeping her hydrated, passing her ice chips in-between contractions, now however was no time for hydration. Now was time for pushing and screaming.

If she had any wherewithal rey would have been horrendously embarrassed by the screams coming from her but after 20 minutes of pushing hard there was no way she wasn’t going to scream. How big was this baby?!

Amilyn had continuously encouraged her to breathe, now however she had made a firm promise that one more push and her son would be here. So rey had put everything into this push and after 20 seconds of grinding her teeth and holding her breath, she felt her baby finally come free.

Amilyn quickly handed the baby over to the assisting nurse and clamped and cut his cord and asked rey if she wanted him cleaned up first. She shook her head vehemently and asked for her son, holding her hands out eagerly.

Amilyn grinned as she handed over the now towel swaddled baby.

“Here you go dove, your baby boy”

Rey held him close to her chest, peering down at his scrunched up little face. She stroked his cheek, soft as butter as she felt her own cheeks dampen with tears of pure unadulterated love.

“Hello my sweet boy. I’m your mummy, I promise ill be the best mummy you could ever had. You are my life, my reason” She lovingly breathed down at her little boy.

She couldn’t take her eyes away from the little bundle in her arms but out of the corner of her eye noticed that Leia was dabbing her eyes. She hadn’t noticed that ben had slipped from the room. All she could think of and all her brain had the capacity to do was stare at her son. Amilyn had given Leia some instructions to pass on to Rey before leaving the room and Leia had sat back down next to the bed waiting for Rey to come back down to earth.


	8. Mr Bunny

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey has a sound first nights sleep, even with a new-born… Thanks to a little help.

At 6:42am on the 13th December weighing in at a whopping 9-pound 11 ounces Baby Noah was born. Rey was smitten, in love from the very instant she lay her eyes on her little boy. She couldn’t believe she had made such a perfect little bundle and that he was here safe and sound. He had 10 teeny little toes and 10 beautiful little fingers, a smattering of dark hair curled on the top of his head, every time she looked at him her breath hitched. Perfect.

She had been cleaned up along with her son and then rolled to another private room where she was told to make herself at home. As a ward of the state she would stay here a little longer just to assess her and the baby.

Maz had come to visit her at midday, bringing along a little blue balloon on a stick, rey had smiled at the gift. They had a long discussion about how she felt and if she was sure of the choices she had made to stay with the Solos and assured her that if she required any help with parenting there was a plethora of classes Maz could get her into. Rey thanked her, praised her for everything she had done over the past several months. Getting her into a safe home, ensuring she was cared for, allowing her to have a say in what happened to her and her baby’s future. Maz had shielded her eyes but Rey saw them turn glassy as she had hugged her goodbye, promising to drop by at the house when she was settled better.

Next had come Leia and Han, they had sat next to her bed and watched her cuddle her son. Rey noticed the longing look in Leias eyes and passed Noah straight over to her. Leia had been as pleased as punch to get a cuddle and smell his beautiful little head for that new-born smell. Rey had laughed commenting about the baby smell that came from the other end. They had left shortly after, letting her know they would be back in the morning and to let the midwives help her if she needed it, she had nodded whilst Han smirked at her, a knowing look that knew full well she wouldn’t ask for help. She was happy, finally in as long as she could remember she truly felt calm and happy with her life. Only one thing niggled her a little, she hadn’t seen Ben since Noah had been born and it was now pushing on 9pm and she was so tired. She hadn’t slept the night before for contractions, she had been in and out throughout the day, resting when Noah slept but what she needed was a big healthy dose of sleep. 

A little upset by his no show, she placed Noah back in his Bedside crib and lay down knowing it would probably be 2 or 3 hours until he woke again for another bottle.

“Shhh, Shhh, there, there little man. I’ve got you, I think mummy might need a bit more sleep”

Rey had awoken slightly at her son’s murmur, guessing it was time for his next feed but then she heard a voice she knew well comforting the baby, so she didn’t open her eyes, just listening to his low voice and Noah’s little snuffles.

“I’ve got you, let’s get you a bottle shall we. Surprise mummy with some extra sleep, I bet she will like that. She was up all-night waiting for you to come”

She heard him shuffle off to the other side of the room and then slowly return to the seat beside her bed, not many moments later she heard the tell-tale sign of Noah suckling on a bottle.

“Wow, you are a hungry little monster aren’t you. Must get that from your mummy, she eats like a horse”

Rey had to fight the smirk threatening to break out across her face. She could try to be indignant about the remark, but there would be no point. She ate like it was her last meal, she knew that, she also knew the comment was said without any malice but if she wasn’t mistaken maybe a little bit of affection.

After a few minutes it seemed her son had finished his feed, she felt something placed lightly on the bed next to her, she assumed it was the empty bottle. She then heard the soft ‘pat pat’ of a palm on a babies back to bring up wind. After a monumental burp from her son and a small chuckle at the sound, she heard a shift next to her. Expecting her baby boy to be placed back in the crib beside her she was surprised to hear him start to settle Noah in his chair. At this new development she slowly opened her eyes, looking over to a sight to behold.

There sat Ben, her baby swaddled in a blanket on his chest, stroking up and down his back. Bens chin resting upon the top of his head shifting from side to side slowly. Small ‘shushing’ sounds escaping his lips, similar to the times he had helped Rey and comforted her during a bad day. She smiled affectionately and let out a breath.

Bens eyes lifted to her quickly, widening a fraction at being caught, but then he shrugged slightly the corner of his mouth lifting happily.

She nodded at him and whispered “Thank you”

A few more moments passed, and it seemed Noah was well and truly asleep, she motioned for Ben to place him back in his crib and as lightly as he could he lowered him down, tucking him back in to keep him warm. He sat back down and huffed a small breath, looking back to Rey.

“I’ve missed you” She said without any preamble 

“I’m sorry, I was…. I was doing something” He evaded slightly.

“Oh” She looked down, a little dejectedly.

“Rey, look at me please” he asked, she lifted her face to him slowly “I was doing something for you and Noah”

“Oh” she replied again but this time a little more hopefully

He ran his hand under his hair and she saw him rub the back of his neck with his palm, a nervous reaction she had discovered very quickly with him.

She took a deep breath “What were you doing?”

“It’s something I would rather you see than me tell you about, it’ll wait, don’t worry” He grinned at her.

“Well I’m sure whatever you have done I will love it. Noah seems to mostly like milk, so I don’t know how he will react” She giggled softly, ben joining her until she said “I heard you, you know”

“Hmm” he had replied in question, but she knew from the paling of his face that he was aware of what she was talking about.  
“Someone seems to be filling my sons head with delusions that his mummy eats too much, I wonder who that is?” She snarked at him.

“I have no idea who would do such a thing, I mean they aren’t wrong, but...” He stopped there beaming at Rey.

“No, they aren’t….” She yawned then “Gods, I’m so tired, who knew having a baby was such hard work”

Ben looked at her softly, a smile played on his lips “I’ll be here to help you Rey, whatever you want I’ll do my best to help you and Noah”

“Ben if there is anyone, I could count on for that, it would be you. Thank you”

“Ah you missed the best bit” She watched as he reached down to the rucksack at his feet, unzipping it quickly and rummaging around. He slowly slid a small, big floppy eared, blue bunny from his bag. “This is Mr Bunny”

She chuckled, holding her hand out “Oooh so original” she tittered 

“He is for Noah, this however” he reached down again into his bag pulling out something new “This is for you”

Handing over a small bag, rey opened it eagerly. At the top of the bag lay 2 individually wrapped Snowballs, she moaned in appreciation. She would devour those, she moved them aside and looked lower, to a long deep blue velvet box. She looked at ben, raising her eyebrow, he motioned her to pull it out.

She lay the back to her side and put the box on her lap in the bed. Softly stroking its lid, she found the seam and lifted. As she looked inside, tears gathered in her eyes, her heart almost bursting from her chest. Inside was a gold necklace with 2 heart shaped links at the centre, one inside the other. The biggest read ‘Mummy’ and the smallest read ‘Noah’.

The tears streamed down her cheeks as she gazed back at Ben, her heart taking up a faster beat than she thought possible.

“Ben it’s so beautiful” she choked out “Why?”

“Why not? I saw the look on your face as they handed you Noah and I knew that you were taken. It was a sight Rey, the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen. In that moment you became a mum, I’m so proud of you”

At that Rey let go of a sob, not a sad sob but a joyous wonderful sob. She placed the box back down and beckoned Ben to her. He got up eagerly and edged himself onto the bed next to her, from the slight stiffening of his shoulders Rey is pretty sure he didn’t expect her to throw her arms around his shoulders and pull him to her in the most tender yet ferocious hug.

She sobbed softly into his neck, he relaxed letting his arms shift around her back, one hand stroking her softly the other gripping her to him tight.

“I don’t know what to say Ben”

He breathed into her hair “Nothing, you don’t need to say anything. I’m happy that you are happy”

She pulled her face back to look him in the eyes. Her heart jumped, and her brain switched off, because the next thing she knew she had placed a small chaste kiss upon his lips. She saw the look of shock on his face but no anger at her action. She blushed, she couldn’t bring herself to be sorry for the kiss, even if he rebuffed her now, she wouldn’t be sorry. After everything she needed to kiss him, to show him thanks for being him and being everything, all that she had ever needed during her pregnancy. So, it surprised her even more when he leaned back down to her and kissed her forehead softly, letting his lips linger for a few seconds on her head. They sighed simultaneously as he moved away.

“Come on, you need to sleep, that little food monster will want to feed again soon”

Laughing a little breathlessly, Rey nodded and shuffled herself down in the bed to get comfy. Ben moved back over to the chair he had previously vacated and with a smile on her face she closed her eyes and hoped that when she woke up that this whole evening had been real, and it was the start of something special.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My first night with a new-born was not even remotely this cute or restful. My boys are warriors who believe sleep is for the weak haha
> 
> I hope this chapter made you guys smile. I loved writing it.
> 
> Once again, any glaring errors please let me know or if you just want to comment for a chat I'm good with that too :)


	9. Hopeful Futures

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reys first week back home comes with a surprise but one we probably saw coming.

Rey had made it home 3 days after Noah was born. Amilyn was happy with everyone’s health and Reys ability to parent. Maz was satisfied of the level of support Rey was going to have at Home. She had done a house visit the day before rey was released to confirm all safety procedures had been put into place for the new mum and baby.

Rey was thrilled to be leaving hospital but also nervous as hell. In hospital she knew there were medical professionals there in case she needed them, she was worried that once at home she would make a mistake and have no one there to help her. 

Leia had assured her that she would be fine and if she needed anything, even just a little more sleep, she would be more than happy to have Noah in her and Hans room whilst Rey caught up. Rey was grateful for all the support she was being given but no matter all the reassurances she just felt a little lost.

When she arrived home, Ben had taken Noah and the car seat from the backseat and walked to the front door awaiting Rey. She was still walking a little gingerly, having been told that she had needed 16 stitches after Noah made his appearance. She winced every time she thought about it. Once she reached the door, Ben opened it and let her through first, following closely behind. She breathed a sigh, happy to be back. Leia had bustled forward then requesting a cuddle off the slowly rousing Noah, Rey had nodded and looked adoringly at her son, knowing he was probably going to need feeding soon.

Ben had nudged her arm and asked her if she would come upstairs with him, she smiled and motioned for him to lead the way. Walking swiftly up the stairs, Ben lead her towards her bedroom, opening the door he showed her inside. She stopped still and brought her hand to her mouth with a gasp. Ben had set up the furniture she had bought with her grant money,

“Ben this is what you were doing?” she turned to him, raising her eyebrows in question.

He looked down to the floor nervously “Sort of. I put up most of what you got, just the essential bits you need most. Couldn’t for the life of me figure out the nappy-bin thing though”

Rey laughed softly “I couldn’t either, your mum told me she would sort that out”

He looked to her then and smiled “It’s not all, follow me”

She took a last look at her room and moved down the corridor to the spare bedroom, curious as to why Ben was leading her here. He stopped in front of the room, his hand on the door knob and took a deep breath. Deciding on something he turned the knob and unlatched the door, looking at rey he smiled.

“Close your eyes, don’t peek… Don’t look at me like that you have no impulse control, close your eyes” He smirked.

She closed her eyes and stuck her tongue out at him. Feeling Bens hand slip into hers she was pulled softly forward and through the doorframe. She took another few steps then was stopped by bens hands planting themselves on her shoulder.

“Ok Rey after 3. 1….2…3”

She blinked her eyes open deliberately, eager to see what was in this room, as soon as she focused, she struggled to catch her breath. The whole room was decorated in baby blue and yellow tones, little clouds on the walls and ceiling. A rocking chair sat next to the window with a side table sporting a silver picture frame with a picture of her and little Noah from hospital.

She burst into tears, huge gasping sobs rocked her body, she moved backwards into the firm chest of Ben. Resting her head against his shoulder as she continued to cry, her hands wiping her tears from her cheeks. She felt Bens arms wrap around her waist from behind, comforting her, leaning his head down to rest on her shoulder.

“Is this ok?”

“It’s amazing, its perfect, the whole room. Exactly how I would have done it” she breathed 

“I didn’t mean the room Rey”

She pivoted around on the spot, still circled in his arms, she moved her hands to his chest looking him in the eyes. “Yes Ben, this is fine” She leaned up and placed a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth.

She heard him sigh faintly, tightening his arms momentarily around her waist. His head bowing back down on to her shoulder again. She felt him nizzle into her hair. Inside she was beaming, on the outside she felt another tear slowly fall from her eye catching on the smile on her lips.

She broke away from Ben half-heartedly, not really wanting to be out of his arms, but she could hear the kettle boiling downstairs and knew that meant a bottle for Noah. She was even more eager to get back to her son than to stay in Bens arms. That little boy already had her twisted lovingly around his little fingers.

The first week back home passed quickly, Rey had gotten herself into a routine. After Ben had showed her all the little tweaks he had made in her bedroom and in the house, she had found parenting her son to be tiring but worth every yawn. She had wobbled on the 5th day, sobbing over everything and anything. Tears had fallen because she couldn’t get Noah to burp and it set her off on a chain reaction of doubt and thinking she would fail at being a mum. Leia had called Amilyn to ask her to reassure Rey that this was most likely ‘baby blues’ but had added that if the thoughts continued to get herself to the clinic for a check-up.

The feeling had passed by the next day and by Leia telling her all about the plans for next week. For the Solo Christmas that she was about to be a part of. She was excited for Christmas to come for hers and her baby’s first in a family home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this chapter is short, I've had a nightmare week. I'm working on the next chapter though so hopefully get that done ASAP.
> 
> As always I appreciate each and every single reader, kudos leaver and commenter. Love you all.
> 
> If there are any errors, let me know x

**Author's Note:**

> The first 15 or so chapters are going to be pretty fluffy, lots of laughing and cuddling and love.... I'm sorry to say though, its all going to go down hill for a bit after that, however I promise a Happy Ending :) So please stick with me.
> 
> As always, if you like my story I would be forever grateful for Kudos and I love to read your comments so if you want to leave me one I will always reply.


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